it’s been that kind of week.

thanks for stopping by.

so, sunday?

i swear. sunday, just before noon

went to the snow. IN FREAKING MAY. sorry, but this blows my mind. people skiing/ snowboarding/ snowshoeing/ what-have-you in… may. clearly, i’m not from around here.

also? about 30 minutes later?

same time zone, same day.

perfect sunny weather. this seriously blows my mind. and, all about 30-45 minutes from my house. while i was enjoying that beautiful weather, i saw this:

that sound is me giggling at a toilet

best. obey. ever.

thanks for stopping by.

being exposed to me has its good points and bad points.

first, i have to expose you to the original version of mahna mahna.

it’s one of those things most people have heard, or seen, or somehow been exposed to. it’s also something i say at work. well, mahna mahna, i’ll say. a co-worker might chime in with that do doo do do do chorus, or people might look at me funny. like that’s going to stop me.

but one guy i work with – we’ll call him the chicken man, because he has himself quite a few chickens – is apparently easy to imprint. it had already been a crazy day. he sat down next to me, just as i was saying mahna mahna. he sang do doo do do do, and then kept going with the rest of the song. we laughed about it, saying, wow, that probably the quickest song-getting-stuck-in-the-head ever. then we all go home.

a few hours later, i get this text on my cell phone:

Monomunop do do do do do/ Monomunop DO DOO DOO DOO DOO

it made me laugh so hard. i text him back: i win!! i am the awesome!! he responds with:

YES. YOU ARE!!

it’s nice to have someone agree on your awesome standing. anyway, i only see this guy a few times a week. yesterday – monday – i do it to him again. he tells me that mahna mahna can be cancelled out by singing the theme song to “the greatest american hero“. which we do for awhile. and then we al go home.

once more, a few hours later i get a text (spelling issues are his):

OMG YOUR GOING TO HELL WITH ME AND ALL MY FRIENDS! Munominop do do do do do Munominop!  OMG LOL

my response: dude, i have a condo in hell, already paid for. it’s on the nice side of the lake of fire! he says:

i will pick you up in a limo when you FINALLY ARRIVE!! YOUR RAD!!

he’s very excitable, the chicken man is. but i do have a heart. i went to youtube, and found that link for the greatest american hero. i text him back: i found the cure on youtube. the greatest american hero will save you!

chicken man says:

OMG YOU OPENED A CAN OF WORMS! DO DOO DO DOO DO! FOR SURE!

…

this is what phlebotomists do in their free time.

thanks for stopping by. do do do do…

so, yeah.

… do you ever have those times where you don’t even know where to begin? i’m having one of those times.

this week, kitten has been lethargic. not herself. slightly out of breath and exhausted. but then, she’s 10. which is, like, 60 in cat years. i took her into the vet. which was a feat in and of itself. i don’t deal with veterinarians. not because i don’t have the money or anything like that. but… my cat, she is aggressive. the last vet asked me to not bring her back.

don't come back unless you're covered in bacon

she’s a spitfire, really.

so, i take her to the vet. who tells me to run, not walk, to the animal emergency room down the road. who whisk her away while i’m filling out papers. and then usher me into a little room, where a much nicer vet asks me a bunch of questions about kitten, and tells me he has no idea what could be wrong with her. while we’re sitting there, some tech is testing her blood. a normal red blood cell count (these are the cells that carry oxygen from your lungs to the rest of your body) for a cat is 40-50% of the total blood volume.

my cat, when i brought her in? about 7%. not good, y’all.

so, they stick her in a oxygenated cubby and wrap her in a fleece blanket. i’m a bit hysterical, so they ask me to go home, and they’ll call me with updates. the updates are the best part of my day. the cliff notes version of things: she’s had a transfusion from one of the donor kitties in residence at the hospital (the idea of live-in donors knocks me out), and is doing well. x-rays have shown some stuff in her stomach, which could be food. or not, it’s hard to tell. they’ve run a few blood tests, and are waiting to hear back from pathology. she has a kitty IV. she’s biting the staff, which is normal behavior for her (she’s fixed and aggressive. she’s the awesome). she’s eating and drinking, which she wasn’t earlier. they’re keeping her, at least overnight, to monitor her. i visited with her earlier, and it was clear that she was happy to see me, not so happy to be staying, but resigned to hanging out for the night. i scratched and rubbed her normal spots until she drifted off to dozing land.

we know it’s not feline AIDS, we know it’s not leukemia. i’m pretty sure it’s a liver or kidney problem. i’m hoping to be wrong. i know it’s a major thing, whatever her illness. i’m just kind of hoping it’s little major, and not big major. i already know her hospital stay is pricey. we’re amazingly lucky i have the money sitting in an account.

they can rebuild her. they have the technology.

(insert six million dollar man sound effects here)

i can’t even begin to tell you all how absolutely terrified i am of losing my cat. my burping, farting cat who cleans herself loudly when company’s over. who will poop on people she really doesn’t like. who head butts me most mornings. who crawls into the knitting basket for extended naps, and curls up next to my shoulder when i’m reading in bed. the cat who seems to really dig hip hop, buries her face in my hair when i’ve used that one shampoo, and sometimes licks my nose is what has to be her version of a kiss.

the cat who, probably right now, is whacking at some technician while they try to check on her IV line. as is her way.

"i fart in your general direction, kniggit"

i’ve been asking the universe most of the day to help me out here. to let me have my crazy little cat restored to me. what really has me bent out of shape is the fact that, whatever she has, it’s a chronic thing. meaning it’s been going on for longer than the last week. which makes me feel like an absolutely bad person. surely, i should have seen something before now, if i was any kind of a mom. i know that animals hide their illnesses, and really, i did the best thing for her by rushing her to the hospital instead of letting the non-hospital doc run tests and adapt a wait-and-see attitude. i’m upset that the first vet – the non-hospital guy – made me feel like an animal abuser, saying that i should have seen that something was wrong sooner (yes, he really did say that. kitten tried to poop on him, but she was too weak).

anyway. i’m distracted. my furry baby is really ill. i can only visit her three times a day.

the once and future crazy

leave a message at the beep, is what i’m saying. i’ll get back to you.

kitten says meow. i say, thanks for stopping by.

i’m okay with being the last person to know about cool new stuff. i was probably the last of my close friends to sign up for gmail, for example. and, i’m totally afraid to admit it, but i still have a hotmail account. which is kind of like admitting you still smoke because you think it makes you look cool.

and, until sometime this morning, i was still using a yahoo! homepage.

i’ll wait until the nerds have recovered.

(hums quietly to self, and watches the dog run full tilt into the screen door. again. he’s not smart from any angle, i tell y’all)

anyway.

so, i was goofing around on the ancient desktop we have at the house. the same desktop z uses to – gasp! – check her hotmail, and shop for shoes and airline tickets. and, the same desktop that z dog has been watching porn on. i only know about the porn because… well, i’ve been around the block quit a few times. i have good hearing. and i know porn when i hear it. it’s a rather distinctive sound.

i’m digressing. remind me to tell you about the night of the bizarre house rules. that culminated in me hearing the porn from down the hall, and through a closed door.

ugh. i’m gonna have to wash my hands with bleach after i’m done typing here. these keys are a bit sticky.

anyway, google.

go to the google homepage. basic, clean and the beginning of awesome. now, in the upper right-hand corner there. see the igoogle link? click that sumbitch. clicky all the stuff you’re interested in, and i strongly suggest you click on your town. then, the google makes your own shiny new homepage.

but! that’s not all!

not only is the google page more informative than my yahoo! page, but there are all those tabs at the top. i clicked on the ‘portland’ tab… and it gave me local news, transit information, movie times, blah blah. it also gave me a concert and event calendar. a complete one. meaning, big music acts rolling through town alongside the little local bands playing the little dive-y bars.

i’m sure you all know about the igoogle. like i said, i’m usually the last to know. but dudes… i am in love with the google.

and now the google loves me back.

thanks for stopping by.

so, i went with YMCrae and our bodyguard, otis redding, to last thursday on alberta. it’s basically an art walk type thing, but it seems to get a little crazier each time. by nine at night, the sidewalks are so packed you can barely step forward, and we end up holdting onto otis so we don’t get separated.

otis, for those of you new here, is a giant dog.

anyway. we also saw a movie up at the kennedy called forgetting sarah marshall. people, i don’t normally laugh out loud. i laughed so hard at that movie, i may have snorted a few times. it’s good and silly, go see it.

so, we then walked last thursday. and saw many odd things.

people are entranced by otis. everyone wants to touch him. it’s like he’s a rock star. i was telling YMCrae that people should tithe every time they say, ‘wow, that’s a big dog!’ yes, he’s a saint bernard. she knows he’s pony-sized. what is it with stating the obvious? he loves the attention, but he’s easily distracted. pet near his back end, and he’ll forget he’s walking.

musicians playing on a front porch. right around the corner from this, someone had set up huge speakers on their front lawn, and were blasting what sounded like techno. it was just mean, you know?

woman on fire. it just looked cool.

i really like chandeliers. they’re charming.

alberta. so, next time? should you see two girls walking with a horse, you’ll know they’re us.

thanks for stopping by.

so, a little internal-memo moment for you’s. i’m only adding comments through november 2007. this is largely because… it takes a loooooooong time. the posts theyselves are easy to cut-and-paste from ye olde blog. but all those comments.

i’m no marathon runner, is all i’m saying.

real post below. thanks for stopping over.

so, i’m in a slightly foul mood. i missed my alarm thursday night, and i was late getting to work. but, since the people i work with are decent folk, i may have a way to make it look like i wasn’t late at all, and i totally planned that little abscense. also, the lab manager at my clinical site is starting to grate on my nerves, but i can’t say anything bad about him until either a) i finish my clinical and hie myself to less stupid waters, or b) they hire me in the job i really don’t want, and am not even in school for. and i can’t really fault the guy, because i don’t think he’s aware of how annoying it is, the-thing-he’s-doing.

anyway.

uh… you know what we, as a group, really need? some keychains. specifically, some keychains from here. and while it’s a totally safe link to look at from work, i don’t recommend looking at the merch section while drinking any fluids. in case you’re experiencing difficulties, the keychains are here. although, those necklaces are pretty sweet.  and by sweet, i mean totally disturbing. how would you like to go on a date with anyone wearing that?

uh… yeah. thanks for stopping by. i’m really going to buy one of those keychains.

so, this has been me lately, yes?

just a bit of a blur. sunday, a friend was taking pictures, and i was a blur in every one of them. remember that silly-ass movie the ring? where people died after watching this one tape? there was a bit about how, the people that were marked to die, were blurry in pictures. or their faces were melt-y. whatever. i haven’t seen any weird tapes. the only movie i saw was cloverfield. i think i’m okay.

but dude… what do you think happened to marlena? heh. cecil’s totally going to hate me.

and as an aside… is anyone fidgety about what the happening will be about? i mean, i have knitting to distract me, and i don’t know how the rest of you cope. but i kinda like night’s movies.

anyway.

i don’t really talk about my job. sure, i talk about the stabbing, which is fun and entertaining. i mean that, which will possibly freak some people out. and there’s weird stuff afoot in terms of what i’ll be doing at the end of clinicals. but since it’s all a grey area, i choose not to discuss it.

but the stabbing is not my job just yet. as i explained to someone yesterday, i work in the lab for free. i get paid in knowledge. there was a bit of eye-rolling, but i’m sure y’all knew that.

there are things i deal with, on a day-to-day basis, that i don’t think you fine folks need to hear about. sure, there are some crazy-ass moments. like, when a bunch of alarms went off all at once, and it took us forever to quiet things down? at the end of that, i grabbed a newspaper and said, “okay, who am i right now?” i then tucked the paper under my arm, turned toward the restrooms, looked over my shoulder and said in my best husky voice, “i’ll be right back. gotta go drop the kids off at the pool.” everyone else erupted in laughter, because this guy we used to work with, joe, said that all the time. which is totally a guy thing, by the way. girls say they’re going to the restroom, and girls that work in healthcare can be creative in alerting their co-workers they are heading off to use the facilities (‘dude, my back teeth are floatin’. i’ll be back.’). but we, in general never annouce our, er, intentions, the way guys do.

but then, our jobs are all about poo and pee. so maybe there’s a need-to-know that i’m not aware of on a conscious level.

one thing i won’t miss will be suppositories. when i worked in long-term care, my patients used to call them ’silver bullets’, because they came in this foil packaging. they would casually say to one another, oh, i’ll be riding the silver bullet tonight. which… didn’t that used to be a beer commercial? it’s funny, in a weird way.

although, i will not be getting away from colons, apparently. last week i was in specimen processing (which was absolutely fascinating in a dorky kind of way), and i was called to the operating rooms to collect. i thought they wanted me to draw some blood, and i was a little confused. even more so when the nurse comes out of surgery with a plastic container, and hands it to me. the container was labeled ‘colon’.

i was holding someone’s ass in a bucket.

i also am willing to bet there will be fewer body bags in my new area of medical expertise. i mean, yes, there will be body bags. i have already assisted an orderly in getting a former patient into a bag. which, to tell the truth, doesn’t freak me out anymore. i don’t know if this means i’ve developed a callus over that part of my psyche or what. but, i think once you’ve worked in hospice, and watched someone’s descent into death a couple of times, you either learn to deal or you change jobs. i learned to deal and got a job at a hospital.

it’s also a little startling – as long as i’m talking about death – to provide someone’s care, and they’re suddenly more lucid than normal. the first time this happened, i didn’t really understand. but then the next day, that patient was gone. he had died a little while after i left. this is really only true for terminal patients; if you’re dealing with people that have dementia, they could think you’re their child. but now, when i see the eyes open, or light up, and the hands reach out, i don’t back away. some people do, which makes me want to slap them. i take their hands. i look in their eyes. i smile, and sometimes i ask them questions. yes? what do you see? that sort of thing. it’s not always the end, but… usually it is.

i’ve always thought i was in the right place, in terms of what i do for a living. i have… you know, i don’t even know what it is. i wouldn’t say i have empathy, because that’s not quite it. or sympathy, which will get you sucked into the swamp of sadness if you carry every emotion home with you. it’s something about my face and my personality. something about me makes people want to talk to me. this is great when i have little kids that were just in car wrecks, and i have to ask them where it hurts, and they just want mommy. this is also great when i have an elderly man who doesn’t understand what’s going on or why such-and-such is happening, and i need to know how many of this pill he swallowed.

it’s also pretty helpful when someone is scared of needles, and i ask them about the book i saw them reading. or the child’s picture in their wallet when they took out their insurance card.

i don’t really have a point. but it’s taken me a long time to realize that this is where i’m supposed to be. and there will always be opportunities for me to laugh at myself.

and deal with asses.

thanks for stopping by.

so, it’s sunday. i have gotten a lot done (but i did forget non-dairy creamer at the grocer yesterday, so i’ll have to take care of that this morning) (i’ve gotten a few co-workers addicted to flavored creamer. so, i’m enabling), but i’ve done little that’s photo- or blog-worthy. laundry, knitting (not ready to be shown! super secret and all) bloglines continues to torment me. now, here’s something i don’t get. i’ve gotten seven emails about how bloglines says i haven’t updated, right? i went and had a look at my subscriber list. and – this is simultaneously embarassing and perplexing – i only have two subscribers. what about those other five emails? maybe they were gonna subscribe, then saw there was trouble afoot and just gave up. and yet… accoding to my hosting service, i have close to 300 readers.

meh. whatever, i’m glad you’re here. however you got here.

my stupid movie for satuday? cloverfield. okay, first? i really wanted to see persepolis. but i felt that it would require me to pay attention more, and i really just wanted to knit in the dark. so, we opted for cloverfield…

heh. the cafe i’m at is playing “brick house”. brilliant!

anyway.

so, it was a good movie, cloverfield. i’m not going to discuss or parse it. it’s a monster movie; what’s to discuss? i will say – if you need to understand everything happening onscreen, you won’t like it. we left the theater saying things like, “what do you think happened to lily? what about marlena?” and if you’re prone to motion sickness, you may not like it. much like the blair witch project, the camera is less than steady. and, from what i’ve read online, people don’t like it. really,now, what were you expecting? it’s not going to change your life. but i would wait until it’s at a second-run theater, where you can have beer and pizza along with your cheese, you know?

gratuitious and random photo:

this was last saturday, while running errands. that would be snow, of which there is none today.

thanks fo stopping by.