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Archive for the ‘look what i can do with a sharp stick!’ Category

… i really, really, really have to like you to knit for you. or create anything for you.

first, it’s labor intensive, making stuff. it involves planning, color spectrum analysis (which i used to farm out to kitten, but sadly i now have to do it by my ownself) (by the way, i still hear the cat in my room. is that weird? anyone? and is it even weirder that i’m worried i’l leave her spirit behind when i move?), and math. and a bit of brow furrowing on occasion. there’s also washing the finished whatever-it is, and blocking if it’s made of the yarn. and then i have to remember to take pictures of it, so i can brag about my handiwork on ravelry.

second, i’m sure i’m doing my wrists and shoulders no favors. even if i am hunched over some way beautiful yarn. i’m still hunched over (yeah, i’m not sure why, either) and doing some repetitive stuff. so, that’ll be awesome in 10 years.

third, i’m totally setting myself up for failure. if i make something for someone, there’s the huge chance they won’t like it. or they won’t appreciate it. even when i knit for myself, there’s a chance i won’t like the finished object.

and i’m totally not complaining. these are the risks anyone takes with sharing their creative outlet.

however. i am super choosy about whom i share my obsession with. some people… well. they don’t deserve to be knat for. you know?

my roommate, z, is one of those people. when we were snowed in this winter, i gave her a pair of my self-knit wool socks. because she was cold, and because they made me itch. something about this particular brand of wool. i gave them knowing full well she wouldn’t appreciate them. sure enough, even though i told her they were wool, and shouldn’t be introduced to the dryer, she managed to shrink one of them. yeah, just one. now she has an unwearable pair of socks. awesome.

about six or seven years ago, she was on my case to make her a blanket. i have a bunch of crocheted blankets, and she loved them immensely. they’re warm and pretty, and each takes me about a month to make. even though her birthday’s in august, i made her one of these super-warm blankets.

they're interlocked squares of flowers

they're interlocked squares of flowers

she loved it, and thanked me.

this past winter, she brought it out and had it on the back of the couch. where it’s still sitting. and where i noticed…

this angers me to no end

this angers me to no end

abuse.

now, if shoes were switched, and this were her hard work sitting mangled on my couch, i’d ask if there were a way to repair it. or, ask her how i could put it back together.

seriously. i want to have a screaming, kicking fit about this

seriously. i want to have a screaming, kicking fit about this

i don’t know if the dog is absently chewing on this (he loves yarn, as more than a friend, if you get my meaning), or if the kids are picking it apart. all i know is, i have a similar blanket, and it still looks perfect.

rage... taking... over

rage... taking... over

but, i do take care of handmade objects.

so, those socks she wants? no. the cardigan she’s pestering me for? hell to the no.

god, those pictures piss me off so much.

on the brighter side of my knitting addiction… i’m working with some beautiful hand-dyed alpaca.

oh, squooshy greenery. how awesome you are

oh, squooshy greenery. how awesome you are

dyed with plant and vegetable dyes. meaning…

like cheeto dust, only green. and not dusty

like cheeto dust, only green. and not dusty

it looks like i’m doing dirty things to the hulk over here.

just wrong

just wrong

thanks for stopping by.

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you know what’s great? when you’re having a super lousy day, and you decide the best thing for your foul mood is a walk. and you go to the nature-ish path near your house, and within ten seconds, you’ve managed to slip on some mud and fall spectacularly on your knee. with witnesses.

yeah, friday was a great day. i’m not even joking about the ten seconds. i wish this bruise would photograph well.

anyway.

so, it’s been a not-great week and change. if you’ve been playing the home game, you know that last week, i took miz ophelia to the emergency room vet, where they poked holes in her and gave her a boost of blood. she’s still doing well. on wednesday, the vet called to tel me that she has lymphoblastic leukemia. which is a type of bone marrow cancer. so, that’s bad. but, she’s still on my list of favorite things. and now, she’s pretty much allowed to do whatever she flippin’ wants. it’s a house rule i have – if you get cancer, you get your way. so, she’s been sleeping under the sheets sometimes, and drinking right out of my glass when it suits her. and eating crackers. which i don’t feel bad about, because they’re the annie’s organic bunny crackers. those can’t possibly be bad for her.

it's a dirty job, but someone's gotta do it, yeah

it's a dirty job, but someone's gotta do it, yeah

she really likes the dirty jobs dvds.

i’ve nearly finished knitting a pair of socks. which is not a big deal by itself. but, considering that i started the first sock this past monday, and i’m a few inches from completing the second sock here on sunday, it’s a fast set.

it reminds me of stained glass windows

it reminds me of stained glass windows

i can’t show you the whole sock, because they’re a gift, and i’m not entirely convinced the recipient doesn’t read the blog. but they’re cool, and i wish they were my size.

seriously, it looks like a muppet to me

seriously, it looks like a muppet to me

i discovered what can only be the single ugliest scarf i’ve ever tried to make. i stuffed it away a while back, and i found it today. it’s so not my style.

like i eviscerated a muppet and put my head through it

like i eviscerated a muppet and put my head through it

i mean, as a scarf it’s not my style. clearly, i enjoy the idea of it being some kind of accessory.

this gives me the desire to swig vodka

this gives me the desire to swig vodka

or prop.

also?

doctor who screening 191207

i’m not the kind of girl that has crushes on movie stars. i tend to reserve myself for television actors, apparently. and not only do i find david tennant’s version of dr who to be amusingly cheeky, i have a desire to get the TARDIS tattooed on my person. if you don’t follow dr who (and really… what’s wrong with you that you don’t?), the TARDIS is that police box the guy’s standing in front of. it’s really a time-and-space travel machine.

i kinda want one in the backyard.

thanks for stopping by.

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this morning, i decided to take the train to work. largely because i’m stubborn and lazy – the chains are on my car, and i refuse to take them off just for the joy of driving to work. the train tracks are not frozen today, so that seemed a little smarter.

anyway.

i’m standing on the platform, watching the train pull in, and i notice the time/ temperature ticker reader thingy. the temperature, at nearly seven this morning?

nineteen degrees.

which is nothing if you live in canada, or alaska. but to me, standing there in four layers of clothing and two sets of gloves? it was a little nippy out.

i’m now making mittens. and maybe my own felted human hamster ball, to wait for the train in.

now that i’ve typed that… wouldn’t it be kinda awesome? my own fuzzy cocoon.

yeah, i know i’m not saying anything of great gravity or relevance. it’s hard to think with this huge migraine and frozen plants.

but thanks for stopping by.

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dear knitty,

i freaking love you. i want to make just about everything in your new winter issue. except that vest, because i’m just not a believer in vests. or belted cardigans. or victorian-esque neckwarmers. also, i will not be knitting that big butt-looking cushion. while it is cool, and awesome, and fabulous, i don’t see a need to add another ass to my household.

but knitted earrings? i see nothing wrong with that.

also? way to give me a slew of things i really want to make. just in time for the snow that’s supposed to start happening this weekend.

like i need another reason to stay home and watch re-runs of dirty jobs with mike rowe.  i am just saying, is all.

thanks for stopping by. send bacon in a few days.

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because i’ve done nothing truly exciting. and by ‘nothing exciting’ i mean nothing that doesn’t involve bloodletting.

oh, and i’m officially not allowed to be a mom. when you pop out a kid, the hospital does these PKU tests. that involve, you know, some blood. and since the baby is still so very wee at testing time (between 24 and 72 hours after birth, is when the test must be performed), the test of choice involves a lancet (spring loaded sharp object), a baby heel, me, and some absorbent paper.

i desire more practice. which is why i’m not allowed to have kids.

anyway.

february’s socks were completed on time. however, they currently reside in moi’s sock drawer. which is in southern california, and i am, you know, not. so, as soon as our california correspondent gets on that, you can see those.

march’s socks were not done in time. and i’m willing to bet neither will april’s socks. because, while i am riding the rain to work, people look at you funny when you whip out your knitting. like, they give you a long, hard stare. so, i also carry a book. and the book gets me stares, too. sure, it’s about a cholera epidmic in the 1800s, and it says something about sewage on the cover. people tend to shy away from the word ‘sewage’ before 9am.

anyway. april’s socks are progressing slowly. we’ll see what happens.

so, for those of you that show up for the knitting, here’s the march socks:

the yarn, while nice, is a bit too stripey. i’m hating yarns that are stripey right now. so… yeah. they fit just fine. they sit just shy of my kneecaps, which is longer than i really wanted. as you can see, the short bursts of color in the yarn meant a lot of pooling/ striping action. enough that you can’t really see the pattern i used, or the awesome foot shaping.

they’re very comfortable. and this picture shows the leaf pattern i used. it’s kind of like those pictures that were popular in the last decade. you know, where it was just a bunch of random-looking colors, but when you focused and relaxed, you saw a sailboat or something. i mean, supposedly. i never saw the hidden pictures personally. i guess i’m just special that way.

i have other projects that have been completed this year, and i just haven’t gotten around to getting pictures of them. so, since i have good weather happening, i should get on that.

and with that, i end abruptly. thanks for stopping by.

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oh, dudes… ravelry is total crack.

i may have never known about this yarn without ravelry:

 

dude. eyeballs. in the yarn. super badass!

sadly, insubordiknit is out of the yarn at this time. aw, crap. i need this. i don’t know why, exactly. but i require some of this yarn.

with eyeballs.

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so, wordpress and i had a semi-minor kerfuffle over some pictures this weekend. i’m not sure wha happened (yes, i meant to leave the ‘t’ off there. please don’t email me about it), but i think there was a misunderstanding between firefox and wordpress.

because the pictures are doing okay now. psh, i don’t know. i even dug explorer out of the hard drive, and it gave me the same load of crap about pictures.

and yet, it’s working just fine now. what the hell?

it’s an issue. i’m working on it. that’s otis up there.

so! i spent my weekend being a total dork. as per usual. i knitted up a storm, and… i finally sewed up a cardigan that has been finished forever. see, i made this pretty red lace cardigan. and lo, it was good. except for the sleeves. they sucked, they were a little snug and scratchy, and their seams blew goats. just trust me on that. so, i re-knit them. and then i just lost interest in the cardigan. it’s been sitting in a basket waiting to be sewn up for, like, months now.

so finally, i sewed that bitch on up. and, i neglected to take pictures. largely because i was thinking to myself, screw pictures. i can’t post them.

der. i can put them up on ravelry. along with pictures of other stuff i’ve been meaning to put up.

blah blah blah.

anyway… i mentioned my interview on friday? i think i got the position, but i won’t know for sure for a few more days yet. but man… that interview was surreal. it wasn’t anything anyone did or said. it was more my exhaustion. work, clinical, race home for a shower and a change of clothes, then bolt over to the interview. i was a little wiped out. i think it helped me be a little more normal. i’m usually a bit on the tightly-wound side, or at least very-nervous-and-trembly. and i stutter a bit. being so pooped as i was, made me seem calm and relaxed.

i may be outsorcing my sleeping from now on.

 

she does it so well. after my interview, i went looking for this portable version of guitar hero i had seen on the innernets, but i had no luck. and then some small part of my brain notified me that i was seriously close to passing out, and i should just go home. which i did. and which i did.

 

my bedside table. i really like the lighting, is all.

oh, and i really wanted to show y’all this. i’ve been having some color issues, it appears.

 

green shoes, tequila sunrise socks, blue scrubs. i think my hoodie was green. with dark green bunnies. but i was giving people headaches, what with all the crazy.

i dare not tell them i get dressed in roughly 30 seconds, and i don’t have time for frilly things like mirrors most days.

at least i use soap. thanks for stopping by.

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