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seriously. “creature of the night”? i mean, i know it’s a kiss song, and i’m pretty sure there are a trillion songs with the same name by ‘dark and mysterious’ bands. but i swear there’s a bit in the rocky horror picture show where susan sarandon gets it on woth the beefcake boytoy thinger. er… did i just garner more dork points?

psh. whatever. there’s obscene amounts of snow everywhere. i giggle at the slightest provocation.

Which creature of the night are you?

Your Result: Werewolf

You are a vicious fighter and a vicious lover, absolutely dedicated to your pack. You are pushed to anger by disloyalty and injustice and have a tendency toward sudden, periodic bursts of wild behavior.

Cthulu Spawn
Which creature of the night are you?
Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

no real surprises there. i mean, i’ve torn out a few throats in my time.

happy whichever-holiday-you-celebrate. i’ll be at work, because blood still needs to be drawn. also, i’m just so damn happy to not be snowed in at my house anymore.

cheers. and thanks for stopping by.


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the next few days will be all about playing catch up here at chez lapin. not that my schedule has simmered down any, but i’m tired of starting blog posts and never coming back to them. i’m pretty sure i’ve lost seven of my nine regular readers, but… well, i have no one but myself to blame for that.

so, i’ll be performing feats of updating in the next few days. largely because the cafes have air conditioning, and the house has… issues. like, my roommate thinks 80 degrees is just fine in terms of the a/c. i’d prefer something closer to 70. i compromise and set it as 75, but then she shuts it off. so, i spend a fair part of my day just dripping sweat. i’d open a window, but it’s been in the triple digits here. which is nothing if you’re living in the southern part of the country. but, in oregon? it’s crazy talk.

also? the a/c makes it easier for me to knit. and if i don’t knit, no one’s happy.

now, i had planned on a meatier post today, but i noticed that i hadn’t been downloading anything onto flickr lately. so, i’ve spent the last three hours cleaning up and uploading over there. and now, my butt’s a little numb. so, y’all will have to pardon me while i get some blood flow happening.

and maybe some food.

thanks for stopping by.

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    so, i went with YMCrae and our bodyguard, otis redding, to last thursday on alberta. it’s basically an art walk type thing, but it seems to get a little crazier each time. by nine at night, the sidewalks are so packed you can barely step forward, and we end up holdting onto otis so we don’t get separated.

    otis, for those of you new here, is a giant dog.

    anyway. we also saw a movie up at the kennedy called forgetting sarah marshall. people, i don’t normally laugh out loud. i laughed so hard at that movie, i may have snorted a few times. it’s good and silly, go see it.

    so, we then walked last thursday. and saw many odd things.

    people are entranced by otis. everyone wants to touch him. it’s like he’s a rock star. i was telling YMCrae that people should tithe every time they say, ‘wow, that’s a big dog!’ yes, he’s a saint bernard. she knows he’s pony-sized. what is it with stating the obvious? he loves the attention, but he’s easily distracted. pet near his back end, and he’ll forget he’s walking.

    musicians playing on a front porch. right around the corner from this, someone had set up huge speakers on their front lawn, and were blasting what sounded like techno. it was just mean, you know?

    woman on fire. it just looked cool.

    i really like chandeliers. they’re charming.

    alberta. so, next time? should you see two girls walking with a horse, you’ll know they’re us.

    thanks for stopping by.

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    not the number of socks i’ve knit, or posts i’ve started and not hit the publish button.

    thirty-two years old. been blogging for about… uh… three of those. but that’s an anniversary for next month.

    and here’s the problem with my birthday. remember how i was saying a few weeks ago, about how you shouldn’t treat people like obligations? for a long time, my birthday was treated like an obligation. by me as well as other people. and i just got tired of being let down. friends would never remember my birthday, and i’d feel like an idiot reminding them. i keep starting sentences to illustrate my point here, and i keep deleting them, because they sound sooo petty. i really wanted people in my life to take notice of this one little day. i didn’t give a crap about presents. all i wanted was eye contact and a happy birthday wish. possibly, i was not easy to read in this regard.

    on my twenty-fourth birthday, i was told i had ovarian cancer. which is a great time to be told you have a potentially fatal problem somewhere in your nether regions. the best part of that was, the guy i was dating at the time was such an idiot that, when i told him the doctor said i had cancer, he actually said, well you didn’t get it from me.

    yup. this is the same guy i would beat with a baseball bat later that same year. such a winner, you know?

    so, before cancer my birthday was no big deal. after cancer, i really wanted it to be a big deal. i mean, my body had tried to kill me, but i was still here and alive. which is a reason to celebrate, right? right. a guy i knew threw a huge party for my twenty-fifth, and i was tearily thankful. not just for the party, but for being at the party, you know? i spent most of the night just hugging people. i was seriously so glad to still be walking and talking. to be above ground. it’s a feeling i have each and every day, although on a much smaller scale.

    fast-forward to this year. after having an argument with a friend about how low-key i was being about the big day, i had to stop and think why i was so not interested in my birthday this year. it’s not a depression over getting older. while i have wrinkles in places i don’t deserve to have wrinkles, i’m thrilled with getting older. again, if i hadn’t whooped cancer’s butt twice, i wouldn’t be given this chance to age.

    here’s the deal. i’m just tired of being let down. it’s not like my current circle of friends make me feel like the last item on a to-do list. far from it. but… well, i’ve spent enough time in my past being let down. by others as well as myself. i’ve spent too much time feeling inadequate, and feeling like maybe i shoulda just let the cancer kill me. like maybe everyone would be happier if i weren’t here.

    hi, i am 12, apparently.

    my point is this: i’m going to appreciate everyone and anyone that takes time to wish me a happy birthday. even a belated birthday. and i’m not going to mope over how so-and-so paid no attention to my birthday, and how it must mean they don’t care. i’m glad to be alive, but somewhere along the line i lost my ability to be joyful for simply that. for just being alive.

    so, today? for the first time in my working life, i did not take the day off work. instead, i volunteered to do the blood draws for the oncology department. almost as difficult as finding a vein on a 24-hour old baby. i’ve done both, and believe me, the baby is easier.

    anyway. i went to work. i took care of people. i saved a woman’s life when she started choking two rooms down from where i was, and her granddaughter screamed and no nurses were available. i’m not saying i made a difference. i’m saying that the last few years, since the last time i had cancer, have been a struggle. and i’m just now getting to the point where i say things that sound totally trite. like, i’m here. i’m alive. i’m so glad to be here.

    part of my commute

    here. portland specifically. the planet in general. above ground.

    y’all have no idea. but thanks for stopping by.

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    seriously. not only have i changed my layout, but i believe i have fixed the picture mishaps. i may experience another change in layout, because i’m not for certain that this is the one for me. but, there it is, and here i am. and, as the name implies, i have pictures to share. as usual, everything is on flickr, and you’re more than welcome to mosey on over there to see the full gamut of crazy.

    for now:

    the ceiling of the twilight room. and, a little reflection below where it says ‘chili’.

    this is not normal blood. but it kinda looks like a jellyfish. full explanation on flickr.

    pup-bionic. no, i’ve been taking the train to work since moving to day shift. it’s cheaper than paying for parking at the job, even though it sucks up about three hours a day. i saw this in a window while waiting for the train in downtown portland. and… okay. is anyone else creeped out by these? it’s just not right.

    what happens to your tongue when you eat a smurf.

    gratuitous cat shot.

    and, finally,

    the crazy bedside table, redux.

    thanks for stopping by.

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    wow. i had no idea there was so much weirdness on the interwebs.

    that’s all i really have right now. because… well, wow.

    oh, and i got my dream job. and a raise. and the job keeps getting dreamier.

    and, my horoscope basically told me to stop fantasizing. which is lovely and brutal all at once.

    and, it’s a lovely day out, and i intend to go play in it a bit. oh, and saturday i got to pretend at being a rock star while queenie tested out her new studio. note to self: do not wear black when you know damn well the backdrop is black. also, i have freakish looking upper arms. and also, since when did my boobs start looking like that?

    ‘kay. we’ll chat later. the sun calls.

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    (hi. moving in. please stand by.)

    i was going to rehash the why-i’ve-changed-hosting-services thing i posted on the nearly ex-blog, but there’s no point. i’m embarassed it’s taken me this long to actually improve on things. and it’s totally an improvement. like, that flickr sidebar over yonder? took me less than two minutes to slap together. as opposed to the ‘cut and paste the html code into the blah blah blah’ and me hoping i wasn’t erasing really important bits of code.

    which looked like it was in french. which makes me wonder about programming in general. if you’re in germany, for example, does the code look vaguely germaic?

    i don’t know. i’m not a real programmer. i click. sometimes stuff crashes. then i just fix it and pretend like nothing happened. that’s how i roll.

    it’s also how i knit. but anyway.

    look! a cat!

    do you know how flippin’ easy that was? do you? there was no hoop of fire. no badgering in french, because i used the wrong tense or whatever.

    i may be happy.

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